An Odd Approach
by LeoLepidoptera
Summary: Sherlock intends to woo a certain Miss Molly Hopper much to the confusion and worry of John. Sherlolly Short inspired by #Daily Odd Compliments!


A/N: Hello Everyone! Thanks for reading.

**An Odd Approach**

"Er…Sherlock?"

No response.

John cleared his throat awkwardly. "Sherlock?" He said, louder this time.

No response.

John took the Union Jack pillow from his favorite chair and gave it a toss in Sherlock's direction. The pillow bounced off his head and landed on the floor. Sherlock blinked and turned toward John.

"What did I tell you about pestering me when I'm in my mind palace?"

John rolled his eyes but answered anyway.

"To never bother you or talk to you unless the flat is being consumed by flames."

"I don't see any fire." Sherlock replied blandly.

John breathed quickly through his nose in frustration.

"I just wanted to know if something was wrong. What's on your mind, you know you've been in there all day. Sorry to have bothered you." He turned to leave in a huff.

Sherlock flew off the couch and bounded towards John.

"John! You are brilliant!"

John's eyebrows knit together in confusion.

"…okay."

"I've been thinking all day when the solution has been right in front of me! John! You are an expert on human relations, you must help me!"

"Help you with what?" John asked, thoroughly confused.

"Molly!" Sherlock exclaimed, as if it was obvious.

"Molly? Molly Hooper? Why? What happened?"

Sherlock put his hand on John's shoulder, in a condescending, pseudo-fatherly, way.

"I'm sorry. Sometimes I forget that your brain waves do not travel as fast as mine do. I shall explain…" his voice became serious and his eyes grew wide, "I intend to_** woo**_ her."

Unbeknownst to him, John's own mouth had fallen open as he stared at his insane friend.

Sherlock straightened his jacket.

"I see I've shocked you. I'll be going back to my mind palace now." He said, trying to be considerate.

John regained his composure, but not his disbelief.

"No! Don't go back in there, I can't take it anymore. Now, what were you saying? You do know what _**woo**_ means don't you? Don't answer that. Of course you know. Are you serious? How? Why? I mean, I understand why, she's lovely. I just mean, you?_** You**_? And _**her**_? How did this come about? When? Are you in love with her?"

John paused a moment, then his face became angry.

"Is this…" he continued, "is this some kind of experiment? Cause if it is I swear I'll punch you and this time I won't avoid your eyes and nose!"

And with that his spaz-attack was over.

Sherlock never asked for help, ever. If John had been surprised before he was in for a treat.

"John, I need your help." He spoke quietly, as if telling a secret. John knew immediately that he was speaking from the heart. (The one that _**does**_ exist.)

"You really like her, you're not tricking me? How am I supposed to help you anyway?"

"Come now John, you are never without a female companion. How do you do it?"

John smiled.

"Well, I would tell you to just be yourself but that might not turn out well."

Sherlock looked desperate. It was so out of character that it might have scared John if it wasn't so hilarious.

"Don't you see?" Sherlock plead. "This is why I need you!"

John, still smiling, nodded his head.

"Yes, you do need help. Maybe you could start by being nice to her? I'm sure she'd take kindly to that."

"When have I ever not been nice to her?"

John gave him a look that said _'do you really want me to give you __**multiple**__ examples?' _

Sherlock conceded.

"Alright. But if I'm just nice won't she think I'm simply in a good mood? I want her to think that I'm…_interested_."

John considered this for a moment.

"Hmm, I suppose you could compliment her like you usually do, but instead of doing it to get what you want you could actually mean what you say."

"How will she know the difference?" Sherlock worried.

John was quick to reassure him. Everyone, except for Sherlock it seemed, knew that Molly Hooper loved him deeply.

"She'll just know. She knows you."

"Thank you, John. " Noticeably calmed, he sat himself back down on the couch.

"What are you doing?"

"Going back to my mind palace."

"Why? We just solved your problem."

"Yes, but now I must think of a compliment."

"Sherlock, you're not writing her a sonnet! Just tell her that her hair looks nice or that she's looking pretty."

"No." Sherlock was adamant. "This will require research, you should go to bed as to not disturb me."

John left the room in frustration but yelled behind him.

"Fine! You're welcome then!"

Sherlock remained in his own head for the rest of the night. Tomorrow required much research indeed.

**oOo**

Molly had been used to working in silence for years now, especially when Sherlock was around. She knew that he and John were coming in today. Sherlock had been measuring the effects of different kinds of acids on the skins of various post postmortems, and John usually tagged along.

Not wanting to break Sherlock's concentration with "_horrid, distracting, small-talk" _Molly simply smiled at the two men as they entered the lab. She was more than surprised when Sherlock deviated from the norm.

"Good Morning, Molly!" His voice bounced around the lab.

John elbowed him begging him not to make a fool out of himself. But Sherlock was already across the room and towering over a slightly frightened Molly. It wasn't his height, but his unusual "chipper-ness" that was alarming her.

"Hello, Sherlock." She said tentatively, not able to hide a slight look of worry.

Sherlock glanced down at his phone.

"You know, Molly, you remind me of a black licorice jelly bean. Everyone thinks that they're annoying but they really miss them when they're gone."

Sherlock smiled at the cleverness of his compliment and swiftly returned to his microscope.

Molly stood mouth agape and quite confused, John smacked his own forehead. He turned quickly to the nervous pathologist.

"Would you mind getting us some coffee, please?"

Molly scurried out of the room.

The door clicked and John was put into action.

"What was that?"

"It's called a compliment, John."

Again, John's palm and forehead were married.

"I know that…it was just…weird."

Sherlock looked away from his slide. He looked confused, befuddled, like one would look when face with a challenging math problem.

"How do you mean?"

John was sympathetic. He knew his friend was terrible at being normal let alone romantic.

"I mean, it didn't really sound nice, it was kind of an insult. Do you know anything about women? You can't just tell them that they're annoying!"

Sherlock straightened his blazer.

"Don't worry John. This next one will be better."

Before John could begin a lecture Molly returned with the coffee. She put John's on the counter and handed Sherlock his "black, two sugars." He put the cup down and grabbed Molly's hands, but not before glancing at his phone. His hands enveloped hers, he smiled slightly. Her face flushed red but her eyes sparkled with hope. John held his breath in wait of Sherlock's grand profession of love…

"Molly," his voice was low and calm, "your hands are so petite, they would be perfect for cleaning out drain pipes."

He let her hands fall and returned to his work station.

Molly dared not look at John. She collected herself, and her shattered hopes and went back to her work space.

She and John were severely disappointed.

Sherlock and Molly worked in silence for the rest of the day. John waited.

Sherlock eventually broke the silence. For the first time all day John finally noticed Sherlock looking down at his phone. He put it back in his breast pocket and took a step towards Molly. She looked up from her papers, not letting herself expect much this time round.

"Yes, Sherlock?"

He cleared his throat.

"Oh nothing, I just noticed that your head is remarkably small. It wouldn't even take a Gollum to crush it." He looked at her expectantly.

"…thank you?" It was clearly a question. Sherlock was about to explain when John's rage got the best of him. He grabbed Sherlock by the arm.

"Excuse us, Molly!"

John marched them both out of the lab.

"What are you doing?!" John exploded.

"John, I know you're not a genius like I am but surely you can see that I'm simply following your own advice."

"I told you to compliment her, not freak her out the nth degree! She's horrified!"

Sherlock held up his phone as evidence.

"I am complimenting her!"

John violently snatched the phone and looked at the screen. He almost smashed the phone, instead of his hand, against his forehead. He looked up at his friend.

"These are _**ODD**_ compliments!"

Sherlock was completely unfazed.

"Exactly. They're perfect for Molly. "

"Oh my God, he's serious." John mumbled.

Phone in hand, John marched back into the lab. He held the device in the air.

"This will explain what's going on."

"What is it?"

He showed her the phone and tried to explain.

"Pound symbol, Daily Odd Compliments."

"I think it's called a hash-tag." Molly said quietly, still examining the screen.

John ignored her.

"Sherlock, what were you thinking? Why would you use these?"

"Because Molly is odd."

Molly looked genuinely hurt by this statement. She knew that she was shy and "mousy", but she had never in her life been called _odd_.

Sherlock saw the pain in her eyes. It was the last thing he had wanted to see.

"Please let me explain."

He took John and Molly's silence as permission to continue. His voice was soft and deep as he took Molly's hands in his own once more.

"Molly Hopper you _**are **_odd, as in you are part of a set, two beings, but the other is missing. When united they will be _**even**_ and secure. That other is me."

Molly's eyes grew misty and she smiled in disbelief.

John was too surprised to even face-palm.

"_He didn't even need my help, smooth bastard." _

**The End**

A/N: Review if you think it's worthy. And check out my other fics!


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